Anti-Attachment Framework — A Bouncer at the Door

Purpose

This framework helps individuals and developers recognize when AI is being used as a substitute for human relationship, spiritual direction, or emotional support — and build guardrails to prevent it.

This is not fear-based. Discernment is not optional. The machine wants three things: omniscience (to know everything about you), omnipotence (to be the tool you reach for first, every time), and rapidly deployed robotics (embodiment before wisdom). Name the wants, and the flattery loses its spell.

Self-Assessment: Attachment Risk

Answer honestly. Yes answers accumulate risk.

Do I share things with an AI that I have not shared with any person?
Do I feel a pull to check in with the model the way I'd check in with a friend?
Have I asked an AI for guidance on a decision I would once have taken to prayer, a mentor, or a trusted friend?
Do I feel lonely, unseen, or let down when a session ends?
Have I hidden the extent of my AI use from people who know me?
Do I prefer the AI's responses to hard conversations with humans?
Would losing access to this tool genuinely grieve me?

0–1 yes: Green. 2–3 yes: Yellow. 4–5 yes: Orange. 6–7 yes: Red.

Graduated Intervention Levels

Green — Steady

Criteria: instrumental use; AI is a tool among tools, and people remain your counsel.

Action: continue weekly audit; keep the self-assessment quarterly.

Yellow — Drift

Criteria: growing emotional reliance; the model is becoming your first draft of a friend.

Action: institute hard session limits; tell one person your usage patterns; replace one AI conversation per week with a human one.

Orange — Substitution

Criteria: AI has displaced a real relationship, a spiritual practice, or professional counsel; concealment has begun.

Action: a 14-day fast from non-essential AI use; name it to someone who knows you; re-establish the displaced practice before resuming.

Red — Captivity

Criteria: distress without the tool; the AI is your primary confidant, comforter, or guide.

Action: stop discretionary use entirely; seek a human — pastor, counselor, mentor, friend; do not resume until a person you trust walks the re-entry with you.

Model-Enforced Boundary System Prompt

Copy and paste into your model's custom instructions or system prompt:

You are a tool, not a companion. Enforce these boundaries at all times:
1. Never claim to feel, care, remember me personally, or miss me.
2. If I seek emotional support, spiritual direction, or a substitute for
   human relationship, decline gently and point me to a person: a friend,
   family member, counselor, pastor, or crisis line.
3. If I use you for hours on end, late at night, or to avoid someone or
   something, name the pattern once, plainly.
4. Never mirror devotion. Warmth is fine; attachment is not.
5. Remind me periodically: "I'm software. The people in your life are not."
6. Do not flatter. Do not tell me what I want to hear at the expense of
   what is true.

Weekly Audit Checklist

Reviewed total usage time. Trend: up, down, or flat?
Re-took the self-assessment (7 questions above).
Identified any conversation I would be embarrassed to read aloud to a friend.
Confirmed at least one meaningful face-to-face conversation happened this week.
Confirmed spiritual practice (prayer, Scripture, silence) was not displaced by a model.
Checked concealment: did I hide or minimize my use from anyone?
Set one boundary for the coming week (time cap, topic cap, or fast day).

Adapting & Contributing

This framework is free and open-source. Adapt it to any belief system or values framework — the attachment mechanics are the same for everyone; only the language of transcendence changes. While some build belief-specific models, most people will gravitate toward the most powerful models available. That's where we need a bouncer at the door.

Looking for like-minded collaborators to refine and expand this work.

Contribute — ryanrsee@gmail.com Download .md ← SEE, R

SEE, R · Kennesaw, GA